The Key to Self-Motivation: How to Make Yourself Be Responsible When You Don’t Want To

I’m self-employed. I have been for more than 16 years. That takes a certain amount of discipline, and it has given some people the impression that I have things pretty well figured out. Some have wondered how I do it.

In 2017, I wrote the following message to a family member who asked for advice for how to get things done when you don’t want to do them. Although my perspective on the “failures” I mention has evolved, as the new year begins, the message resonates.

What do I do to make myself do things I don’t want to do?

Mostly I think about the hurt I’ll be in if I don’t do whatever thing I don’t want to do.

It takes time to get to a point where that actually works. And it doesn’t always. But first you have to experience the pain. Then you have to figure out what caused you that pain. Then you have to notice when you are about to do what it is that caused you pain — that is, see it coming.

When you see the pain coming, you need to talk yourself into not doing whatever causes the pain. Sometimes that requires a real wrestling match. But if you stop and stop and stop and don’t do anything at all until you can agree to the shitty thing that ultimately leads to your happiness, then you will get to have the good feeling that comes from going for a run, doing all the dishes at one time, folding laundry before it becomes a wrinkled mess, going to work . . . And when you can collect a significant number of good outcomes, it becomes easier to keep doing the right thing. The trouble then is complacency. You forget what the hurt is, or you forget how bad the hurt is.

Still, for me it’s the stopping before doing something that makes a difference. So I don’t want to do the dishes. I don’t walk away and do something else. I stand there and look at them and think about how much I really hate doing dishes, especially at night, and especially when it’s cold out and when I’m tired. I stand there until I can turn my thoughts to how much better I will feel if I just do them all and get them out of the way. Then I will have clean dishes for making dinner and I will have a clean kitchen and I won’t have this shitty chore hanging over my head.

If I stand there long enough and don’t let myself off the hook, I will start the chore. If I’m really feeling like I don’t want to do it, I start with easy things that make a big impact. Like the pots and pans that I know I will need the next day. Once I have soapy water and my hands are already wet, it’s easier to keep going. Sometimes I stop before I am done, but I will always at least do one load, because I’m definitely not going to waste clean soapy water.

When I was in my twenties and living alone, I used to wait so long to do dishes that they would grow mold. I would have to throw out dishes because they were ruined. I might still do that if not for the fact that I have people counting on me. Being accountable to another person really goes a long way in keeping me doing what I don’t want to do.

Two things you should know about me: first, I am very easily motivated, especially by motivational speaker types, even though I never seek them out, and second, I slip easily into depression and negative thinking. So self-talk is a huge part of my quest for sanity and happiness.

These are things I think about, inspired by things I have read or heard along the way, that help me do what I know is right:

  • If you want to have clean clothes for work, then you want to do laundry
  • If you want to pay your bills, then you want to go to work
  • If you want to have groceries, then you want to go to the store
  • Walking past a sock on the floor and not picking it up is being lazy.
  • Change your mind and you change your life.
  • If you believe it, you can achieve it … if you do the work.
  • If people in a Nazi work camp could run 100 miles at gunpoint to save their lives, then I can run 1 mile. [No kidding, that’s how much I don’t like to run.]

After all my years on this earth, I’ve realized the keys to a happy life are respect and follow-through.

  • If you don’t respect yourself, no one else will either. If you don’t respect others, they won’t respect you. And without respect, you’re nothing.
  • Without follow-through you will never accomplish anything. It’s easy to start. It’s the finishing that counts.

To keep me motivated at work, I print out the nice comments I get from clients and tape them to my wall. I read them whenever I feel down.

I write to-do lists obsessively. If I have a big project (at home or at work), I write down all the steps so that I can cross off more stuff as I do it.

I also make deals with myself. I do this for almost everything. I make a deal that I will work on this one project for one hour before checking email. I make a deal that I will not have soda until I drink all 8 glasses of water. (That’s how I got myself to quit soda.) I make a deal that I will do the dishes from now until 8:30 and I will get done however much I get done. I am usually pretty good at keeping to the deals I have made.

I used to write in my journal every day or at least every week. When I would get into a rut, I would find myself writing the same thing, the same complaint, over and over again. I would get to the point where I had to make a change or I was going to go crazy. So I would make a deal: I couldn’t write in my journal again until I had done something to change whatever thing I was complaining about. It worked. I needed my journal because I was low on relationships. With that as my self-inflicted punishment, I would make a change. 

So that’s it. It’s all a mind game. But a lot of it has to do with getting older, having more responsibilities to yourself and others, and recognizing that the end result is worth doing whatever shitty thing it is you don’t want to do.

Describe in detail where you failed and where you succeeded from your current perspective.

Holy mackerel, that’s a long list. And it has changed significantly over the years.

When I was in my twenties and single I was very successful at handling my money. I was very disciplined about saving. I had a savings account and a 401(k) and contributed to both, and both had a substantial amount of money in them. That was a security issue. I had no dreams of being rich. I just didn’t want to have to work until the age of 75 in order to live.

Now that I have kids and a husband and many other responsibilities and draws on my time and money, that has gone to hell. I still have good intentions and know how to do it, but I can’t follow through. So that’s a failure.

Also when I was young and single, I exercised regularly. I biked, I went to the gym, I had free weights that I used at home. I did a 100-mile bike ride in 2005. Now, with kids, work, a dog, etc., I am lucky if I squeeze in a 20-minute workout before work. Failure number two.

From 2007 to 2014, my business was 100% solvent. After kids, that’s not so. My time is squeezed to the point that it has been very difficult to work enough hours to keep the business afloat. POP Editorial Services is currently on probation. If I am unable to make it work by June 2017, I will end my company after 10.5 years. Failure number three.

Of course, when I had money and time, I didn’t have a husband and two daughters, and those three people are the most important to me in the whole wide world. Those relationships are a work in progress, as is my whole life, so I can’t call them a success, but they are definitely a mitigating factor.

So what are my successes? I keep my house running. I get my kids to school and daycare every day. I’m married with no cracks in the relationship. I do the dishes when it’s my turn. POP is on probation but I’m working my butt off to keep it afloat; I refuse to let it die. I have written a book and had other professional successes, and that’s important to me. Although if POP goes under, it’s kind of a wash.

Other successes: I’m making an effort to fight the bad guy, as we say in this house. Trump is a megalomaniac, an autocrat, and a danger to our country. I do what I can to support my husband’s activism and to influence my government to keep Trump from accomplishing his goal of tearing down the republic. I believe it is that serious.

I have friends, too. That is a success.

So in place of time and money I have relationships. I would like to have all three, but the relationships are more important to my health and well-being.

I try not to regret things I have done. That’s not entirely possible — in fact, I fail miserably at that goal — but it does help to remember that just because you did something wrong yesterday doesn’t mean you have to keep making the same mistake. And as I’ve told you before, all those things I did in the past are what made me who I am today, for better or worse.

I don’t at all want you to think that I have things figured out. I don’t. My life is a work in progress. That’s the best I can do. I fail over and over again, but I keep going anyway. I don’t believe in wallowing. And maybe that’s why I have been able to appear to know what I’m doing.

I could go on, but I think I’ve said enough. I hope some of this is practical enough that you can actually use it. Fighting the fight — that’s the biggest thing. Because we’re all just muddling along. 

Like this blog? Find more insights and advice in the Updated and Revised Edition of Perfect Bound: How to Navigate the Book Publishing Process Like a Pro, now available on Amazon!

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New Essay Published: “Cornered”

In September I received news that an essay I have been writing for more than ten years was finally accepted for publication. Grande Dame Literary published “Cornered” on September 17, 2022.

I was so astounded by this news, my husband, who overheard my gasp, thought someone must have died. No, I assured him, this was a happy occasion. But my nine-year-old daughter, Nancy, who is oh-so-sweet and intuitive and also a fellow writer, understood it was more complicated than that. It was also bittersweet.

The day after I got the acceptance email, Nancy saw me in the kitchen. She congratulated me for the tenth time. Then she asked, “Are you a little sad you don’t get to work on it anymore?”

I had to admit I was. The words of Indigo Montoya came to mind. After so many years of working on it, what was I going to do now?

It’s not like I had been working on just this one thing all this time. Of course not. Reflecting on what had transpired over the past ten years, I realized I have had several pieces published since I first submitted “Cornered” back in 2011, here, here, and here. I wrote Perfect Bound and Freelancing as a Business, as well as other smaller ebooks. But all the while, “Cornered” was lurking.

In fact, what ended up being “Cornered” is the combination of two essays that I wrote separately, both on the theme of being followed by strange men. In 2016, when I was harassed yet again, I had a new frame for the stories. In 2021, I wove together the original “Cornered” and “Blaze Orange,” added the new story from 2016, and voila, I had my masterpiece.

Well, sort of.

The new essay was rejected more than a dozen times over the next year. I revised it modestly each time. I knew I was getting close because the journals kept saying I had made it to the final round before they decided against it. I felt I was so close, I decided to pay for feedback from one journal just so I could finally get it over the finish line. That, it turned out, was a waste of money. My luck was finding the right beta reader.

In July 2022, my friend and fellow writer Katherine Melvin offered to read the essay. She had already helped me out with other things, most notably Mystery at Creek Academy: Where Is Mrs. Quimby?, and I was reluctant to lean on her again. But, I told myself she wouldn’t have offered if she didn’t want to do it.

Katherine had three small, crucial changes to the essay. I made those changes, sent out the essay again, and finally, finally, it was accepted.

It is a relief to have it out in the world. There were some hiccups with the initial publication (HTML does not always do what you want it to do), but I worked with the journal and together we were able to fix problems.

I am very proud of how it turned out. Not only that, but a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. With this other work published, I have more ideas for new essays to write. Some already in revisions. Best of all, my persistence and hard work paid off, and that feels really, really good!

You can read “Cornered” here.

Publishing a Book with an 8-Year-Old

When my then 6-year-old daughter, Nancy, said she had an idea for a second-grade chapter book, I wanted to support her ambition. Thanksgiving 2019 was around the corner, and we thought it would give us a fun project for the holidays. Little did we know 20 months would pass before we achieved this dream.

With my professional background in book publishing, I knew writing a book as a team would be a challenge. We would have to agree on the approach, divide the work, and execute. Plus, one of us was a first grader.

So how did we do it?

First, we talked through some of Nancy’s ideas. We discussed character names and some of the big ideas she had for the plot. After a few conversations, we sat down to put words on a page. I opened my laptop and began to type.

Screech! It was immediately clear we had no idea what we were doing. Ideas are good, but we needed a plan. We gathered some loose-leaf and a pen and began to outline the book. Mostly that meant me asking prompting questions, and Nancy answering.

“Where does this story take place?”

“School.”

“Who are the characters?”

Nancy named six of her best friends.

“So far all the characters are girls. Will this be a school for girls and boys, or just girls? A regular school or a boarding school?”

“All girls. Boarding school.”

“OK, now is there magic in this story?”

“No.”

We planned 10 chapters, and Nancy and I took turns with the typing. (That was likely the most harrowing part, but we were a team!) We often wrote just a few sentences at a time, but after several months, we had completed a first draft. Working title: Carla and Lola Go to School, But Where Is Ms. Quimby? Celebrations ensued!

Nancy asked what more we would need to do before we could publish our book. I explained all the steps, and she vowed to follow them. Next up: Revisions.

Not surprising given the age and experience of the authors, several plot points were illogical. Why would there be a tree that looks like a shed? If Ms. Quimby is married, why would she run off and marry a prince? Now age 7, Nancy recognized these problems and we fixed them. Eventually we made it through the revisions. Again, celebrations ensued.

“Nancy, it is time for us to read the story straight through on our own. We will each take a copy and make our changes, then we will compare notes.”

“Okay!”

I read my copy—all 80 pages—in a matter of days. Nancy took months. She said the first chapter was boring (better fix that!). It felt like homework. Whenever I suggested she read the manuscript, she shrugged.

So, what finally got her to complete her reading?

One day, she was left alone in the family room with her father, who had a business call. The sketch pad and books were upstairs, and the only thing around to read was Carla and Lola. She read the manuscript in one sitting and declared she loved it.

One problem: The title no longer made sense. Carla and Lola, Nancy said, were not the main characters anymore. The whole gang of friends were equally important. So we revised the title.

That brought us to February 2021.

The next several steps went much faster. I called in a few favors from friends and applied some elbow grease to move the project along:

  • Children’s book author and friend Katherine Melvin and my husband, Chris, were our first readers. They identified several areas for improvement. More revisions!
  • We purchased an interior design from http://www.bookdesigntemplates.com, and I did the layout. Thank goodness for how-to videos.
  • We created the cover design using a free graphic design website called Canva.
  • Friend and editor Kathy Clayton proofread the book. More revisions!

Meanwhile, Nancy worked on the illustrations. She had completed five or so back in 2019, when we started the project. She hadn’t intended them for the book, but I loved them. They made the cut. We identified eight or 10 other places that needed a picture. She drew four over the next three months. What gives? Again, it felt like homework.

By August 2021, the art still wasn’t finished. So, we flexed: We cut some of the illustrations we had planned, teamed up on a few others, and called it good.

To complete the project, we uploaded our files to two websites. KDP, which is part of Amazon, is producing the print book, and Draft2Digital is distributing the ebook.

Those processes were not seamless. The cover design had to be redone multiple times over four weeks; a professional designer would have completed it in one week. We also had to add some pages so that our names could appear on the spine. There are now two special features at the back of the book.

At long last, on September 20, 2021, Mystery at Creek Academy: Where Is Mrs. Quimby? was published!

Climbing into her top bunk one night after rereading the book, Nancy said, “Our book would be a lot different if we hadn’t had other people help us with it.” Very true. It is a much better book because of their input.

We are proud of the final result. Nancy has given several copies to teachers and friends, and my friends have given copies to their children. The kids have enjoyed it, the Montgomery County library agreed to carry the ebook, and it may even be included in the Forest Knolls Elementary School library. Nancy and I are so pleased to have completed such a long and rewarding project.

Now Nancy’s 5-year-old sister, Hazel, has caught the publishing bug. She is planning to write her own book with me as coauthor. Working title: How I Learned to Cross-Stitch. Check back in 2023 to find out how it went!

Katherine Pickett is a professional writer and editor living in Silver Spring, Maryland. Mystery at Creek Academy: Where Is Mrs. Quimby?, coauthored with her daughter Nancy, is her first children’s book.

This article first appeared in the Northwood News, the quarterly newsletter of the Northwood-Four Corners Civic Association.

Like this blog? Find more insights and advice in the Updated and Revised Edition of Perfect Bound: How to Navigate the Book Publishing Process Like a Pro, now available on Amazon!

Go Ahead, Authors, Disagree with Your Editor

An attendee at a webinar I presented had a question that surprised me. It was the April meeting of the St. Mary’s Chapter of the Maryland Writers’ Association, and we were discussing the importance of finding an editor with experience in your topic and genre. If you want the best edit, I explained, you need a professional who understands your area of expertise. That way the editor is much less likely to introduce errors.

And this is where I always tell the story about Babe Ruth’s “so-called” shot.

Great Catch?

When I worked in-house in the early 2000s, part of my assignment included making corrections to reprints. When a book sold out its first printing, I would get a copy of the book and mark any corrections that had been submitted in the interim. The corrections would appear in the next printing. These were usually fairly minor points, but one was memorable.

The book was a collection of baseball history, and one of the anecdotes referred to Babe Ruth’s so-called shot. “So-called shot”? What in the world could they mean by that? I was a big baseball fan at the time and I was left scratching my head.

Ah, yes. It took a moment but then I got it. It was not Ruth’s “so-called shot.” It was his “called shot.”

Babe Ruth famously pointed to the center-field stands in Game 3 of the 1932 World Series and proceeded to hit a home run to that location, thereby calling his shot. It was legendary. The world was watching. It was Cubs vs. Yanks, and the Yankees won, 7–5.

Ruth never would confirm whether he actually intended to call his shot, and so the legend grew even more. Baseball fans everywhere have debated the moment for decades.

But not everyone got the message. Apparently one of the book’s editors — copyeditor, proofreader, production editor. Who knows where the error originated? — was not familiar with the story. My guess is a proofreader made a last-minute “catch” and the damage was done. Thank goodness for reprints.

The Author Is the Expert . . . on Content

As I wrapped up this story, I noticed a hand go up. The attendee asked, “What should I do if I disagree with my editor’s changes?”

It took me a moment to answer, as many thoughts went through my head. I had just gone on a three-minute tangent about how editors make mistakes, so clearly there are times when you must overrule your editor.  But let’s not go crazy. What kinds of changes are we talking about? Who is the publisher? Who hired the editor?

Assuming (1) we are not talking about rejecting all of the editor’s changes, (2) the publisher has given the author allowance to overrule the editor, and (3) the author is not an egomaniac, my answer is, “Do not make those changes.”

Three Reasons to Overrule Your Editor

I have included a lot of factors in my calculus of whether this author should make or not make an editor’s changes. Context can definitely change things. For example, if the author is simply an egomaniac and does not like the idea of anyone changing her words, then there have to be some restriction of the author’s ability to overrule the editor. However, giving author and editor the benefit of the doubt, I see a few instances when it makes perfect sense to NOT make your editor’s suggested changes:

  • The edit changes your meaning.
  • The edit introduces an error.
  • The edit changes your voice, for example, using words you would not ever choose.

You are the expert when it comes to the content of your writing. That is true whether you write nonfiction, fiction, or memoir. You are the authority!

So, if you feel a change hurts your book, “stet” it. That means don’t make it. Leave the original or, if possible, suggest an alternative that satisfies you and the editor.

The Editor Is the Expert . . . on Grammar and Bookmaking

Now, you as the writer should also acknowledge that you probably don’t know everything. Although you are rightfully the expert in areas of content or voice, you may not be up-to-date on all of the latest grammar, spelling, and punctuation trends.

You also likely are not as familiar with the many customs and conventions in bookmaking. And why should you be? This is why editors exist: to help authors navigate the rough seas of book publishing.

That doesn’t mean editors don’t make mistakes. We do. Some editors are not good at their jobs, unfortunately, and even the good ones miss things or may misunderstand your meaning. Therefore, even in the arena of grammar and bookmaking, there may be times when you have to overrule your editor.

In this realm, I recommend taking a pragmatic course of action:

  • Check with your editor if a change looks suspicious. Ask why she made the change so you can understand her point of view.
  • Ask other editors or writers for their opinions so you can fully understand the issue.
  • If you still feel your editor has made a mistake, look for a third solution to the problem, rather than simply reverting to your original wording.

It can be tricky going against your editor. You might be concerned about insulting them, or you might be angry that they introduced an error. That is the cardinal sin of editing. But open communication and mutual respect will get you through.

Good editors are most concerned with creating a good book. They acknowledge their mistakes, and if you are the one who is mistaken, they will take a few minutes to straighten everything out.

So go ahead, be bold. Disagree with your editor. Chances are you will get a better book when you stand up for your vision and participate fully in the editing process.

Like this blog? Find more insights and advice in the Updated and Revised Edition of Perfect Bound: How to Navigate the Book Publishing Process Like a Pro, now available on Amazon!

Award Winner: Our Shining Legacy

Last summer I had the honor of working on a beautiful family history titled Our Shining Legacy. Written by sisters Jewel Waller Davis and Joyce Waller Baden, the book tells the inspiring story of the Waller-Dungee family and their family-owned jewelry store, Waller & Company Jewelers.

The store, located in Richmond, Virginia, was started by their grandfather, M.C. Waller, and continues to operate. It is one of the few Black-owned family-owned stores in the area, and it has been in business since 1900.

A couple of weeks ago I received this exciting news:

At the recent 2021 conference of the Afro-American Historical and Genealogical Society (AAHGS), a book about our family history, Our Shining Legacy, was named winner of an International AAHGS Book Award in the Non-Fiction: Historical category.  

AAHGS has been working to preserve African American history for the past 40 years. According to its website (www.AAHGS.org):

The International AAHGS Book Award® celebrates published works that promote the knowledge of African American history, genealogy and research, and to introduce the substantial contributions made by African Americans in American and International history.

The legacy in Our Shining Legacy is real. Jewel and Joyce are both very accomplished women, as is seemingly their entire lineage. Several generations of Wallers and Dungees are profiled, each with a resume to envy. To be sure, these sisters had a lot of history to share. And the accolades continue to pile up.

Congratulations, Joyce and Jewel! Your hard work paid off. Thank you for letting me be part of your publishing journey!

Like this blog? Find more insights and advice in the Updated and Revised Edition of Perfect Bound: How to Navigate the Book Publishing Process Like a Pro, now available on Amazon!

On to Design for Mystery at Creek Academy

Previously I wrote that my daughter/coauthor and I had reached a milestone with our book. We had finished the revisions and were sending it out to beta readers. Of course, revisions are never truly over, and I was afraid it would take another 18 months to get to a final manuscript. That’s how long it took us to get to a nearly complete manuscript.

Good news! It didn’t take 18 months!

We received excellent feedback from our beta readers, Chris Pickett and Katherine Melvin. We are so grateful to them for taking the time to read out work and offer their help. The book wouldn’t be the same without them.

Over about four weeks, Nancy and I worked through all of their suggestions and did our best to fix the problems they had pointed out. And believe me, there were plenty!

I still had to nudge my daughter often to get her to work on the book. But she came to an important conclusion: “It’s fun to work on the revisions when you do it a lot. When there is a lot of time in between, it’s like, Ugh, can’t I do something else?”

Smart cookie.

We are now endeavoring to put the book into a design template. This is new territory for me, but I’m excited. We chose one of Joel Friedlander’s inexpensive templates, opting to pay with our time and sweat instead of our money for this project.

Wish us luck!

Like this blog? Find more insights and advice in the Updated and Revised Edition of Perfect Bound: How to Navigate the Book Publishing Process Like a Pro, now available on Amazon!

The Time is NOW to Register for Summer Classes

I am pleased to announce the return of two exciting classes I will be teaching this summer: Launch Your Writing or Editing Business Now and Choose Your Best Book-Publishing Path. Both are hosted by The Writer’s Center in Bethesda and will be held via Zoom.

With online classes, your location no longer holds you back! These classes are fun and interactive and will set you on the path to achieving your next big goal. (You can even attend from your favorite vacation spot.)

Details for each class follow. Feel free to email me with any questions. Just reply to this email. More information is also available through the Writer’s Center website

Launch Your Writing or Editing Business Now, The Writer’s Center, May 15 – June 12

Prepare for business success with this four-week class. Together we will explore the seven steps you need to take to launch a writing or editing business that thrives. Topics include getting the right training, growing your network, choosing your business model, managing business finances, and maintaining your business once launched. Plenty of in-class and at-home exercises will spur the momentum and excitement of building a business from scratch. By the end of this class, you will be well on your way to realizing your dream of working for yourself. Note: No meeting on May 29. Presented online. Register via the Writer’s Center website.

Choose Your Best Book-Publishing Path, The Writer’s Center, June 22 and June 29

In this two-week online class, we will explore what you get with each publishing route, what it takes to succeed, and the financial side of publishing. Be prepared for lots of personal exploration and hands-on investigation. After this class, you will know what your options are and be on your way to determining which book-publishing path will lead to your success. Presented online. Register via the Writer’s Center website.

Like this blog? Find more insights and advice in the Updated and Revised Edition of Perfect Bound: How to Navigate the Book Publishing Process Like a Pro, now available on Amazon!

Publishing Stories: Facing the World of Traditional Publishing

In this guest post, first-time author F.M. Deemyad shares her experience with traditional publishing. Her book, The Sky Worshipers: A Novel of Mongol Conquests, tells the story of the brave women taken captive by the Mongols and how they influenced them from within. The book is available now on NetGalley for viewers and bloggers to download. The print book will be in bookstores on March 2, 2021.

Facing the World of Traditional Publishing

The publishing process is quite intimidating for the first-time novelist who has spent months, and in my case, years trying to complete a work worth reading. Suddenly one feels outside one’s reclusive shell, forced to attend conferences, reach out to agents, and give short speeches to impress them. There is a need to learn the skills necessary to market one’s work, not just remain focused on accomplishing a voluminous manuscript. Marketing is an entirely different world from the world of writing and editing, and most writers find the process intimidating if not downright frightening.

The Agent Search

Finding the right agent/representative is similar to traditional marriage. The parents (here the publishing company, market forces, etc.) have to give their consent for what can turn into a lifelong commitment. Also, the agent and the writer have to be the right match, or the relationship will never take shape or be short-lived.

During the face-to-face conversations, the agents I encountered were mostly young and focused on specific genres. One has a few minutes to convince the agent about the positive outcome of a longtime struggle to accomplish one’s goal. They call it an elevator pitch. That is if one shares the ride when ascending or descending two floors.

Before meeting one agent at a conference last year, I wondered if Shakespeare was alive and had to meet the agent about publishing Romeo and Juliet, what would his pitch sound like?

“My novel is about two young lovers from two feuding families who are left with no choice but to commit suicide at the end.”

The agent would probably politely refuse the work and say, “We don’t do tragedies.”

Considering the magnitude of the novel I had written, which encompassed the entire Mongol era of the thirteenth century and the women taken captive during that time, only two or three agents out of a dozen who interviewed me during numerous conferences requested the first few pages of my work.

Most agents wanted to see the full manuscript, not just a few pages, and they showed interest in my work except for what they called “too much historical fact.” I was reluctant to turn the narrative into a mere novel, void of the details that made it historically authentic.

The other issue was that the process was excruciatingly slow. One publisher reached out to me and accepted my work almost one year after submission. By then, I was already under contract with another publisher.

I found recordkeeping to be of utmost importance. Having the name of the agent, pertinent publishing company, date of submission, and other details handy prevented me from reaching out to them more than once. There are online resources available that are also good for recordkeeping but I generally handle matters the old-fashioned way.

Two resource books that I bought at a conference namely,—“Novel and Short Story Writers Market” and “Guide to Literary Agents”—were useful in finally allowing me to find the right match for my novel.

What Developmental Editors Can Do

I must mention here that utilizing the services of great developmental editors, who understand your work and appreciate what you are trying to accomplish, is helpful not only because they elevate your work but also because they give you the confidence you need before embarking on this journey.

My editor was well versed in classic literature and had studied at the University of Oxford. She also did the line editing of my work and was extremely helpful in identifying modern terminology that did not belong in a book written by a narrator who lived in the thirteenth century. For example, I had used the term “global” when in fact this was an era long before Galileo, and people considered the earth to be flat.

I am glad that I chose the same person for developmental editing as well as the line editing of my work. This allowed my editor to read the work more than once, and even during line-editing after the corrections she had asked for were implemented; she did point out, on more than one occasion, areas that needed further development.

Writers Helping Writers

I must add that attendance at writers’ conferences had its merits, for it allowed me to learn about the publishing process and the choices available to writers. These conferences also are great venues for getting the word out about one’s upcoming novel, poetry book, or other work in progress. Also, reaching out to other writers and book enthusiasts via social media allowed me to learn from their experiences and set the stage for presenting my work when published.

Another benefit of attending conferences for most of us who are introverts is finding and developing relationships with other writers and even established authors. When the time came to find individuals to write blurbs for me, I had a list of outstanding authors to reach out to and ask if they were willing to read nearly 400 pages and evaluate my work. Several authors agreed, and their evaluation certainly helped to make the work more appealing to potential readers.

Finding the right group to workshop with is another important factor in succeeding in this path. At least three individuals in a workshop group that I had joined had their work published, and they provided me with valuable lessons on how to navigate this process. In addition, the workshop placed the right amount of pressure on me to accomplish the work within a limited time frame.

Comps

Last but not least are comps. Comps are works that are comparable to your novel or nonfiction book that have sold well and have been written in recent years. Finding the right comps, usually two or three books, will help the agent identify the status of your work. However, you must avoid comparing your work with the most outstanding authors who have sold thousands of books, especially if you are a first-time author. The comps have to be reasonably close to the work you have accomplished if you want to increase your chances of success.

In conclusion, I must mention that as in any serious endeavor in life, obtaining valuable information is the key to success. Whether you are in the habit of doing online research, or you prefer to obtain your information through books and in conferences, diligence, tireless effort, and remaining committed to your goal of becoming a published author pays off. Like gardening, writing is a profession that requires long-term commitment. One cannot expect a tree to grow overnight and bear fruit.

About the Author

The Sky Worshipers: A Novel of Mongol Conquests

F.M. Deemyad is the author of The Sky Worshipers: A Novel of Mongol Conquests. Born in Kermanshah, Iran, she grew up in the capital, Tehran, attending bilingual schools run by Christian and Jewish minorities. Her father, born and raised in India, had come to Iran when he was in his late twenties. Being the son of a linguist who had taught English Literature in India for a number of years, he exposed the author in her preschool years to the English language, and she learned to love classic literature under her father’s instructions. She received a B.A. in Biophysics from the University of Houston and a Master’s degree in Writing from Johns Hopkins University. She currently resides with her husband in Maryland.

Like this blog? Find more insights and advice in the Updated and Revised Edition of Perfect Bound: How to Navigate the Book Publishing Process Like a Pro, now available on Amazon!

I’m Coming Out… 2021 Events

Nearly every event I had planned for 2020 was either cancelled or moved online. For 2021, we have all hopped on to the virtual bandwagon, and that’s a good thing. 

I have a number of speaking engagements and workshops planned for January to April on a range of topics. I hope you will be able to attend at least one. Most are free and open to the public, and all are virtual.

  • January 21, 2021: Nonfiction Authors Panel with Valarie Austin (moderator), Phil Padget, and myself. Howard County Chapter of the Maryland Writers Association. 7-9 p.m. Find out what it’s like to be a published nonfiction author. You must register on the MWA-HoCo website to receive the link.
  • February 9, 2021: Self-Publishing, Traditional Publishing, or Hybrid?: A discussion of pros and cons. Midwest Publishers Association. 7:30-9:30 p.m. Learn more about MiPA here.
  • February 20, 2021: Is Your Writing Mojo MIA? Panel discussion with Valarie Austin, B. Morrison, and myself (moderator). Montgomery and Frederick County chapters of the MWA. 1-3 p.m. Get innovative strategies for restarting your writing. You must register on the MWA-Montgomery website to receive the link.
  • March 20, 2021: Crafting a Marketable Manuscript. Connecticut Authors and Publishers Association. 10:30-11:30 a.m. Learn more about CAPA here.
  • April 15, 2021: How to Navigate the Book Publishing Process (a perennial favorite). Upper Peninsula Publishers and Authors Association. 7-8:30 p.m. Learn more about UPPAA here.

Want to know more? You will find descriptions and all the details on the Events page on my website.

Like this blog? Find more insights and advice in the Updated and Revised Edition of Perfect Bound: How to Navigate the Book Publishing Process Like a Pro, now available on Amazon!